Introducing Agent 00

Michael

Roger staggers away from the kulullû on Queen Minerve of Deneb 4's back, a jagged crystalline fishhook in his cheek. The substance smeared over the barb is slightly acidic, it stings like lemon juice on a shaving cut. Roger needs to roll HT-4 (7 or less).

>>>> FAILURE

Bill

Yeah, that wasn't gonna happen.

Michael

Autohypnosis roll at a +3 (Autohypnosis-18) as Roger staggers back, staring down at his FBI badge and MARPA winged-eye-of-Providence lapel pin as his vision begins to blur.

Bill

>>>> SUCCESS

(Thank, uh, something for the hallucinogens; made it by 3)

Michael

Roger, Papa Legba stirs within you with no vever to ground him into your body as the Opener of the Way, but these circumstances — the strange alien drug pumping through your system, the powerful effect of the newly-internalized meme, the reality temblor zone playing tricks with the collective human unconsciousness, the presence of Queen Minerva herself, even yes, the belief energy of the very few nerds and grognards here roleplaying MARPA agents who have not fallen before Queen Minerva and her "partner's" KI.AG glyph — open the way to a new spirit of the time and place and culture.

Roger, you are now being ridden by the loa Agent Double Zero.

Bill

The Agent straightens up Roger's form, smoothing the suit with one practiced brush of his hands, re-dimpling the tie knot perfectly. "Well, your Majesty, you certainly have me hooked." He smiles, and this isn't Roger's usual smile: somehow a thousand kilowatts of luminescence have been added. Then he draws the gun from out of the suit armpit holster without a ruffle, drops to one knee as a sudden dodge, and opens fire on the thing on her back.

Michael

AMAZING.

Okay so let fly with your shot, and be careful so the innocent Miss Madge Carson, 53, of Sausalito Calif. is not injured by this attempt to kill the horrible parasite from outside history on her back.

Roger/Agent Double Zero can see the Thing detach its claws from Queen Minerva's back in an attempt to scuttle free and dodge the oncoming attack.

Bill

>>>> SUCCESS

(Made it by 5)

Michael

It did not successfully Dodge. Please unleash your damage.

Bill

(This is the Charter Arms Undercover, given the holster.)

7.

Michael

The kulullû is plugged with a single round from Agent Double Zero's gun, almost as debilitating as that devastating pun-quip. It hobbles away, leaving behind a trail of sludgy brown blood as it makes its way for the exit to the Art Room. Queen Minerva collapses to the ground in a heap and the effect of her KI.AG glyph is annulled. The formerly enthralled masses of Queen Minerva fanboys (and, sure, let's be fair, a couple of fangirls as well) scatter in a panic — bad juju under our current circumstances but it does happen to also conveniently clear out the area. As the kulullû retreats it holds up its own SHEG glyph and tells Roger and his doughty band of loyal MARPA Untouchables (God, I'm just picturing a bunch of dudes looking like Dave Arneson and Gary Gygax-circa '73 types here with strangely high Wills) in English, "Leave me be!" Roger needs to roll his Will+Anunnaki programming bonuses here: with the new loa I think that's 22.

Bill

>>>> SUCCESS

By 11.

Michael

"Leave me be" works on the other ersatz "MARPA agents" but … not on Agent Double Zero.

Bill

“The devil I will.”

Michael

The kulullû looks up at Roger with those big, pleading, nictating eyes, seeing nothing in Roger's gaze but the void beyond worlds where the loa dwell.

(I would say that between that quip and the kulullû being severely wounded Roger can coup de grace this awful thing right there on the carpet between the art room and the main lobby hallway. Just as Archie and Charley come up the stairs. )

Bill

A shot right between the eyes. “Well, so much for the hangers-on.”

The Agent will tend to her Majesty before anything else.

Michael

Without the kulullû's "juice" (and given the confusion and stress around seeing a terrible being from beyond history) the glyph on the Queen's clasp isn't really having its original effect on any of the witnesses left after the kulullû's exposure. And so, made into a mere mortal once more, the very normal-looking Miss Carson cries, shudders, and collapses into Roger's arms.

Eddie and Jimmy are standing with some of the rest of the crowd watching all this. Jimmy can't keep his eyes off the dead kulullû, but Eddie looks frankly shell-shocked.

Rob

When Archie and Charley enter the art room, Archie makes a beeline for the boys, but hopefully he observes the dead kulullu, the woman with the glyph, and is able to make eye contact with Roger. "Eddie! Are you ok, slugger?"

Bill

The Agent carries Miss Carson to a folding chair, and arranges her comfortably. He'll take the glyph on the clasp and Sleight-of-Hand it into a suit pocket. Once she's sitting comfortably, he'll turn to the scattered agents, and give a short speech. "Men (of course he says men), this is the kind of infiltration we're fighting against. Stiff upper lip! Look here: this Atlantean woman was under the control of something otherworldly. There is something else going on here."

Michael

" … Dad?" Eddie says. "Are … are you real?"

Bill

The Agent takes in Archie, and nods. Archie, it's clear Roger isn't Roger right now. For one thing, he looks good. Da-amn goood. Archie got the suit to him, but there's no way he looks this good in it.

Michael

Acting-18 roll here. 15 for your new loa's ability, +3 for circumstances and Roger, deep down inside, taking the care to REMEMBER THE METAPLOT.

Bill

(Hey, that loa's partially here because of the Meme. That's right, Archie: the meme is good.)

>>>> SUCCESS

(Made it by 3)

Michael

One side effect of this weird scene (and Roger/Agent Double Zero's very conspicuous decision to fold things into the narrative) is that the MARPA crowd has grown. This guy with the badge handled shit, and did it with charm and aplomb and for some of the people in this crowd who grew up with Sean Connery and various other knock-off Bonds on TV, that's a much more powerful pull than any weird hippie-dippie Atlantis stuff. For instance, the kids who were gathered around Queen Minerva, Jimmy and Eddie included, seem to be looking up to Roger, literally and figuratively. The MARPA contingent has … grown considerably. It's still not as big as Viv's cohort of crystal-mages and soul-singers, but it's bigger than just a few shut-in weirdos now.

It also very clearly states to the crowd who are likely to become part of the game that the Atlanteans are not the enemy; the weird "otherworldly" stuff is.

Rob

Archie to Eddie: "Yes, buddy. I'm real. I'm here. It's ok. Everything's ok." Trying to get a sense of how messed up both he and Jimmy are.

Rob

That's what I'm saying!

Michael

Psychology.

Rob

>>>> SUCCESS

success by 8

Michael

Well, now that Archie (and Charley) are in here, they can feel the Weirdness of the temblor zone … everything feels like one is thinking and moving through molasses, the vistas of mental and metaphysical possibility seem more elastic. If Archie were a betting man, he'd guess the people's memories of this weekend are going to seem very hard to recall clearly. But a little bit of triage might be necessary once the temblor zone is contained. Some after-action memetic smoothing out of things. The Game will encompass a lot of the weirdness of the weekend, as it seems to be doing right now, but … the way Jimmy is still catching glances of that dead kulullû does not bode well.

Rob

So I don't know if I can assert, now, that Archie has any copies of the memetically-loaded packets on him. Maybe Roger/the Agent does? Or maybe one of the "sorry about this weirdness" fliers we gave to the cleaning staff is tacked up somewhere? Or, maybe he can just deliver the meme verbally? Because what he wants to do, that is, what he feels he has to do to protect Eddie and Jimmy's minds (and his cover), is hit both boys with Meme #3: This is just a game, you don't want to get involved, just stay in your room and watch TV.

"It's okay, fellas. Everything is a-ok. They're playing some kind of game. That … that looked awful real, didn't it? Gave me the willies. But it's just some kind of weird, weird game."

Bill

The Agent will walk over to Archie; he does indeed have meme materials on him (Roger was handing them out before.) He'll give a funny little salute (the MARPA one demoed in the panel), and say, "Here, sir." He'll wink, and say "I was always taught to mind my Cs (looks at Archie) and Qs (looks at Charley.)"

Michael

"I get it, Dad. I'm … I'm real sorry we came here." Eddie is sniffling a little bit, looking downcast; Jimmy looks worried as he gets hit with the meme, like he feels like he might be in trouble or something. "Do you think … do you think we could maybe get a room here? I tried to come home but … it just didn't seem like something I should do. I really like it here but … but I'm also really scared."

Bill

The Agent will look vaguely uncomfortable, but then tap Archie on the shoulder anyway. "Sir, lovely to see you in the field. We have some very urgent matters to discuss; if I could bend your ear privately … very soon?"

Mel

Charley is taking in the scene. (Is Roger/The Agent trying to have a side chat with Archie only?)

Leonard

Just in time, Roger's walkie crackles to life. "Agent Martin? Everything clear down there?"

Michael

Rolling 3d6.

>>>> 3d6 … 15

Bill

The Agent ducks around a corner from the general mob of followers. His voice drops into a lower register: "Oh, there's plenty becoming clear down here, Agent Jocasta. You should come down and join the party."

Leonard

Jocasta barely recognizes the mannerism. The voice is familiar, but …

"Uh, okay, Roger … uh, roger that. We have a [Jocasta will say the Danbe word for "bull" or its closest equivalent] up here in the con suite, and Mitch is, uh, Mitch is talking to it. I'm not sure where the conversation is headed, but there's really not much else we can do at this point; it seems to regard him as a peer and I'm not so sure it feels the same way about me." She pauses, feeling oddly flushed (or maybe it's just the scorpion venom). "I'll be down ASAP. I think I minted you some new recruits for your, uh, your army. Anything else?"

Bill

"Control and Quartermaster have arrived. It may have to be a bit more business before pleasure. But let's see what happens once you get here?" Yes, he's being sultry over a walkie-talkie. It takes strange powers, but it can be done.

Mel

(Can Charley get a roll to sense if Roger is at home or someone else? And maybe a bonus for having met one of his loas? Because if she senses whats up she will be keeping an eye/ear on him for sure.)

Michael

(Oh sure, sounds like an Occultism roll to me, +2, so Occultism-17)

>>>> SUCCESS

Yes, it seems like this is another of Roger's loa, but not one you've seen before.

Bill

"I will definitely want to check you out again. Be seeing you."

Michael

Charley's Shadowing-15 vs. Agent Double Zero's Perception-12?

>>>> SUCCESS

>>>> FAILURE

Bill

(Missed her.)

Michael

Yup. She's faded into the crowd that's still milling about.

Mel

(she's right behind you.)

Michael

Those secret agents … they never suspect the kid.

(Thinking of the ending of Winter Kills here.)

Rob

Archie continues to try to reassure the boys. I take it the meme alone is not going to be enough to let them walk out of the hotel unscathed. Or could Archie have any way of knowing that? If he doesn't think they can safely leave, then, yes, Archie tells Eddie and Jimmy we can get a room, just rest there and watch TV (magic words) for a while until they feel better.

Rob

Once Roger is done speaking to Jocasta, Archie approaches him. It isn't private, but he walks a few paces away from the boys in hopes they won't really hear or track his conversation. In a slightly stagey, 'I'm playing along with the game' voice, he says, "Nice work, ah, 'Agent.' That was some sharp shooting." Then more quietly, and sincerely: "Thank you for saving my boy." Then, back to the game voice: "What's the tactical situation?"

Bill

"Control, sir: your man, Rogelio — he took a nasty hit and he's in a bad way. Of course in light of the Special Relationship, I was able to help step in-- interagency cooperation and all that. But I can only do so for a while. Sometime very soon, less than an hour, I'm going to have to pop back to my regular duties. At that point, without me, and with Rogelio likely incapacitated, someone will need to step up here. Before that, I'm your man."

"I'll grow the cadre for the Great Game, get you started. But you're going to have to take Control, C."

Michael

Yeah, we have enough pull with the hotel now that we can get the boys a quiet room away from the upper floors.

he took a nasty hit and he's in a bad way

Looking at the gouge on Roger's cheek, and remembering what it was like to lose his own family to the kulullû's gagkula darts, Archie quickly puts two and two together and surmises that Rogelio is tripping balls.

Rob

"Of course I'll do what I can, but..." (looking around) "it looks like you've done well. The game should take care of itself. Once enough actors are in the persuasion funnel the narrative ought to be self-sustaining." "Does, ah, Roger need medical attention? And are you in contact with our other agents?"

Bill

"He'll need attention, yes. Agent Jocasta is on her way down now, although it sounds like she's having quite a time. Quite. Bull in the china shop."

Rob

"I need to get these children out of harm's way." (Has Archie lost sight of Charley also? He looks around for her.) "Then, as soon as it's tactically prudent, I'd like to meet with our whole team, somewhere. Are our suites on 12 still secure? Or should we set up a 'MARPA base camp' down here? We'll call Livermore, call Granite Peak if we have to, get whatever back up, medical assistance you all need. The memes are going to work, they just need time. But we've got to keep you all in one piece until that happens."

Michael

(You can give me an Observation-10 roll to look for Charley):

Rob

>>>> FAILURE

nope!

Michael

You know what, Rob? Failure by 2 means success because of the Special Rapport.

Turnabout's fair play.

Rob

(well, I'll defer to what Mel wants here — if she wants Charley to get off on her own or to have a scene with Agent 00 while Archie gets a room for the boys, we can say that he either doesn't spot her or leaves her with Agent 00, trusting them to keep an eye on each other for a bit)

Bill

"Sorry, sir: passing the baton to you. If Agent Menos hasn't gotten here by now, she needs my help." Agent 00 turns and takes off up the stairs. The Agent rolls his walkee-talkee across the floor to Archie's feet as he runs.

Michael

I can tell you that as Agent Double Zero makes his way to the stairwell, and Archie looks helplessly after him, the lights in the lobby begin to flicker. They do not go out completely. Passing by the elevators, Roger can see the numbers frozen all on floors between 10 and 12.

Every trip to the top is gonna be a hike now. Fatigue points ahoy!

Bill

Yes, and those are very precious right now.

Michael

So what does Archie need to do now? Get the boys a room? Call Melanie? Talk to Charley? Set up a MARPA beachhead? Take over the now-eager MARPA faction after Agent Double Zero bounded off on his own?

The pains of being Control.

Bill

The title is clearly ironic.

Rob

All of the above, I think?

Mel

Right after the lights flicker, Charley emerges from behind a curtain. And make a b-line to Archie. "Dad! I need to inspect the electrical system of the hotel. I think it's corrupted, and I need to try and repair it. So, I'm going to the electrical room in the basement. But don't worry, I have Houdini with me!" And with that, she picks up the walkie-talkie that Roger has left behind and makes her way to the basement.

Rob

OK, so once everyone abandons him to the nerds, Archie deputizes the most clean-cut Gygax-Arneson MARPA LARPer. "OK, soldier. I've got to get these civilians to safety. Until, uh, Agent Black returns from his mission, you're my number one here. This room will be control center for MARPA's operations. Get some of your team to secure the area, and the rest to recruit more personnel. The Atlanteans may have the numbers, but I know there are still a few red-blooded Americans out there ready to stand up and be counted."

Next, he checks on Madge Carson of Sausalito, California. Is she OK? Does she need a doctor? If she seems distraught or freaked out but not injured, he will hand her one of the Meme 3 flyers and try to steer her back towards her room.

Then, he takes Eddie and Jimmy to get a room on a lower floor, hopefully far from any action. Wherever he goes, in the lobby, etc., he's got his eyes open for signs of History B and/or the game memes taking hold.

Michael

Very succinct summary of the above requests: deputizing a LARPer is child's play for the Man Who Created The Game, no roll necessary. Miss Carson is uninjured physically but very shaken up mentally (simple Psychology check) so the flyer with Meme 3 works a treat on her. I think we'll get a small room on the 4th floor for the Ransom party, so Archie can walk the boys up there imminently. However, for signs of the meme taking hold, I would like Archie to give me one Expert Skill (Memetics)-16 roll and one Hidden Lore (History B)-19 roll. (Charley's comment about those lighting issues will give Archie a +2 to the Hidden Lore roll, already calculated in.) Once Archie gets to the room he's gotten for the boys, will he give Melanie a call?

Rob

>>>> SUCCESS

>>>> SUCCESS

I must not have done the labels right, but the first roll was Memetics and the second History B

Michael

Nice. Okay, memetics-wise Archie can see Roger's suavité as Agent Double Zero was a huge hit. It helped the MARPA end of the game meme get into more minds. While Archie's steady Control act will likely keep the MARPA team alert and loyal and such, it's going to take narratively-appropriate acts of derring-do to keep the MARPA team growing because, well, that's just how Andy set up the narrative. Conversely, it's just when Archie has gotten the room key from the poor front desk person who's been working nearly 13 hours straight at this point that he sees at the edge of his vision, slowly trickling out of the ballroom, a group of gaily-bedecked Atlanteans strumming guitars, holding crystals up to their third eyes, singing and dancing all while handing out flowers to the various con-goers milling about. By the looks of the size of the Atlantean crowd, apparently Genevieve delivered the meme with amazing (and maybe a little frightening?) efficiency.

The History B roll: Archie's a little spooked by the electricity starting to fail down here. Whether or not Charley (and... Houdini?) can shore that up, Archie's not certain. What is certain is that the memetic effect down here has its work cut out for it; the building is slowly sinking into History B. But at least down here there's more or less a new consensus belief, split between Memes 1 and 3, that either we're gonna play this game and make the most of the Weirdness, or we're going to go back to our rooms and do like the see/hear/speak no evil monkeys. It's the upper floors, where there's less human density, that Archie's concerned about. If Marshall's Special One has gotten a chance to spread Meme 2 up there, there's a shot that the "CIA/KGB espionage/game theory" idea is starting to spread. But Archie shudders to think what an Irruptor or two could do to the people who are wandering the hallways up there. So overall ontological sitrep is: could definitely be worse, but could be better as well.

Rob

Would sending (that is, getting the Queen of Atlantis to send) a conga line of twirling Atlanteans up to the upper floors help with the memetic density? Yes, they might run into an Irruptor, but: omelette:eggs …

Michael

Oh absolutely.

Rob

"Narratively-appropriate acts of derring do," I love that.

Michael

So Archie takes Eddie and Jimmy up to room 423 and sets them up with the TV. The effects of Meme 3 and nearly 30 years of SANDMAN perfection of hypnotizing the American people with the idiot box take full effect on the boys.

Rob

Archie nods at the narrative inevitability that he would end up dosing his own son with Anunnaki mind poison, in the form of a command to watch more television, for his own good. If only the boys were also eating Sugar Sharps, just to really drive the symbolism home... Still not sure what to tell Melanie, especially since there's no way of knowing how long this will take to play out. About what time is it, and how much time has elapsed since Charley and Archie left the house to "pick up Eddie at the Trocanos"?

Michael

So let's say it's been about 10 minutes in the car to get downtown, 5 minutes or so to get from the garage to the art room, another 10-15 minutes or so in post-kulullû business and getting up to the room. Almost exactly a half-hour.

Rob

Ok, not that long in the grand scheme of things. Are there phones outside room 423 Archie can use, like at the elevator landings or down in the lobby? He wants to call Melanie but not with the boys right there.

Michael

Courtesy phone!

Yes, you can get an outside line on one of those.

Rob

Archie leaves the boys watching TV, locks the door behind him (they're not locked in, but it's locked to the outside), goes to a courtesy phone and calls Melanie.

Michael

A deep exhale when Melanie hears it's Archie on the phone. "Honey. I... Charley's missing, is she with you? Please say she is."

Rob

"She's with me, sweetheart. She's fine. She stowed away in the back of the car, the little devil, didn't pop up until we were twelve blocks from home!"

"But listen, it turns out Eddie and Jimmy aren't at the Trocanos. They must have either come back to this sci fi thing or else snuck off to see the rest of those darned ape movies. I'm at the St. Francis now with Charley. I'm sure he's fine, but he's going to hear it from me about lying to my face! If we don't find him here I'll head down to the theater and drag him out by his ear."

Michael

Fast-Talk.

>>>> SUCCESS

Another meaningful sigh from Melanie. "This is too much excitement for me, darling. What has gotten into our kids lately?" The slight sound of a choked, stifled sob.

Rob

"Oh, sweetheart. It's … it's not our kids, it's all the kids, lately. Who knows what gets into them? It's summer time, school's out, and they all just want to run a little wild. Chin up, sweetie. It's going to be OK. I'll find the Ape Men and drag them home, along with our littlest monkey, before you know it."

Michael

"Oh, I'm fine, darling. It's just been a lot to handle at once." Melanie seems mollified, but Archie also gets the sense that she's gotten to a Certain Point with the kids and thinks they need a little bit of discipline. "We're going to have to have a very serious talk with both Eddie and Charley when they've gotten home. This city is no place for a couple of 13-year-old boys to be wandering around at night. And Charley … I'm so disappointed in her. I know she's had a very hard time, but … " and then static overwhelms the line. And then Archie hears what he thinks are touch-tone phone tones on the line, but they eventually resolve into … into something hauntingly familiar:

This is indeed one of the Hymns to Those Who Provide from the ZEBULUN Tapes. Let's do a Fright check given the proximity to Archie's family (even if it is telephonically). Rule of 14, success on 13 or less.

>>>> SUCCESS

Archie tries that thing we all used to do tapping the receiver cradle up and down even though how exactly is that going to clear the line and the tones just keep. playing.

Rob

Archie hangs up the phone and jumps back from it, especially once he realizes the song is stuck in his head. Now he doesn't have a walkie talkie, and nobody on the URIEL team knows what room to find him in … so I think he pokes his head in the room, tells the boys he'll be back shortly, and then heads back down to the main floors, the lobby, and I think the Atlantean ballroom.